you know the feeling when you encounter something – a problem, issue, whatever – you thought you’d settled and resolved? gotten over and healed from? that mixture of frustration and confusion and a touch of despair? yeah.
there are things in my life that seem to keep coming back to me. sometimes i wonder if i’ll ever get over them. i wonder if there will ever come a day where i can think back on those things and not be affected. then i wonder if that’s a goal i should be reaching for. do i want to reach that point? is it a good thing to not be affected? if those things were as life-shaking as they were, shouldn’t i be affected, and remember that affectedness, so that i will remember the lessons being taught to me then?
but sometimes i feel like i should be done with it by now. i should be over it. i think there’s something wrong with me because it keeps coming back.
someone once said that it’s when we find ourselves confronted with something for the second (or third or fourth…) time and we’re able to overcome it that we know we’ve grown. in other words, it’s God’s grace that allows us to encounter that thing again, so that He can show us that we CAN get over it, we CAN overcome. it’s like…i was going to insert some biblical story to back this point up, but i’ve forgotten what it was. time to read my Bible…..
anyway, whoever it was that told me that is probably right. so i’ve gotta bring these thoughts, emotions, etc. to You. i am more than a conqueror in You.